Monday, February 14, 2005

Today my valentine will be for my longest close companion. Late this afternoon, my cat, Memphis, passed on. He was 19 years old. He was vigorous and healthy right up until this past Friday when he took ill. I nursed him all weekend, but he was getting weaker and not eating enough. Last night I thought he showed some signs of rallying, but today he wouldn't even touch his water. His eyes looked at me so sadly. He knew that something was very wrong.

I called the vet that I've taken Memphis to for shots and he had an open slot at 3:30pm. It's not far away, so I loaded Memphis up in his carrier and off we went. This was the first time I ever remember him not complaining loudly. He really did not like going to the vet.

The vet looked him over, and suggested that a number of tests be run. He suspected some heart disease, as when he listened to Memphis' heartbeat, he detected a murmur. "A strong 5 on a scale of 1 to 6," he said. I said I suspected that Memphis was having kidney problems, as he'd been drinking a lot of water lately. Much more than usual.

I left him there to be tested. The vet said that the tests should be completed before 6:00pm, and that I could come back and get the results. I was gone less than an hour when he called and said that it probably wasn't necessary to run the additional tests, as they were able to confirm that Memphis had advanced kidney disease. The test produced a numeric result, with 40 to 95 being the normal range. Memphis registered at near 600, which the doctor said was about as bad as he'd ever seen. We discussed the options. The vet said that we may be able to get Memphis past this infection, but that he was now suffering multiple severe problems. At 19, he is the equivalent of a 95-year-old person, and he's had such a wonderful and healthy life, I didn't want to see him suffer anymore. I made the difficult decision that we euthanize him. I feel in my heart that it was the right thing to do.

I went back before 6:00pm and they brought him into a small room and left me to spend some time with him. He was so frail and tired looking, but he looked right at me and rubbed his cheek against my hand. I told him that I was so glad that he'd found me all those years ago.

I told Memphis about all the people that had passed through our lives, and all the people that had loved him. I told him that one of the greatest days of my life occurred one day when I lived in Dallas, Texas. I lived in a very small utility apartment in a big complex just off Park Lane. It was a Saturday morning and I was taking my dirty clothes over to the laundry building, located near the pool. I had no more than come out my door, when I heard the soft, but persistent meows of the tiniest, most sickly kitten I'd ever seen. He couldn`t have been more than a month or so old, and had obviously not eaten in a while. His hair was even looking like some of it had fallen out. He was a very sad sight. I went on down the steps with my laundry, this little kitten following me as best he could. He followed me a few yards before his little legs couldn't keep up in the grass. When I returned he was still there and ran to me, this time meowing even more urgently. I looked down at him, this sad little creature. So alone and with such poor prospects. Most likely abandoned and left to fend for himself. I picked him up and carried him inside where I poured him a bowl of milk. I told him that he could drink his fill and then it was back out on the road. Well, an hour later I found myself at Target buying a litterbox, cat toys, and a scratching post. What was once the tiniest and frailest of kittens grew into an enormous seventeen pound behemoth.

Over the years we'd moved several times, including to California. Relationships have come and gone. But through it all he and I were steadfast companions. He`s always been very difficult for others to get close to. But he and I had an unspoken bond. When I was at home, he was never far away. Usually sleeping in one of his favorite spots. Sometimes aloof, but never for long. And as he'd grown older he'd become more and more loving and gentle. His wildness had given way to long, intelligent stares and he always seemed to communicate with his eyes.

The vet returned and administered the syringe of anesthetic. Memphis looked up at me one last time, and his eyes slowly dilated. I held his paw and stroked his cheek and he passed on. I brought him home and buried him in my garden as it rained.

I am very sad, and tonight is going to be a difficult one, but I am happy for Memphis and his wonderful long life. He was my friend. I wish everyone in the world could have the kind of companionship we shared.
- posted by JIMWICh on 2/14/2005 9:04:41 PM